The Price and Reward for Projecting Ourselves Onto The World
I am one to know as I’ve recently discovered my own projection, and it feels both nasty and freeing. I am that guy who gives people advice; emotional, spiritual, philosophical, business, you name it. I do this professionally in my work, but also on public platforms, sometimes unsolicited, to friends, families or anyone who will listen.
Archetypally, I see/saw myself as a ‘spiritual teacher’ of some kind, and hopefully a shining example to others. Up to recently, it also had a shamanic leaning, which included the use and facilitation of plant entheogens, or what many term teacher plants or psychedelics.
But then I got an ass whipping. Not only was my business growing exponentially alongside the stress, and I was a new father losing lots of sleep. Coupled with a ‘plant medicine ceremony’, my brain chemistry got tipped over the edge, and I found myself having what could only be described as a mental breakdown.
Fast forward 2 months and I was on psychiatric medication, and I finally admitted to myself that I’d suffered from anxiety for decades, and the cherry on the top, I also realized that I was deeply selfish. Losing sleep, extreme anxiety and work/personal pressure can probably make some self-absorbed, but the ‘plant ceremony’ pushed me into a psychological crisis I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
So, there I am the anxious, selfish, medicated ‘spiritual teacher’. What a life lesson in humility is that? It’s irony actually had me in stitches of laughter when I got over the embarrassment. But that experience gave me a lightning bolt of humility (although I’m still quite selfish), forced me into vulnerability, and asking for support from family and friends.
Now, as I come out of that period, I recognize that by simply accepting the selfish, anxious Max that has always been there, and by bringing more awareness to that part of myself, I’m suddenly finding a lot more inner peace and a letting go of striving in my life.
But this experience allowed me to see a once hidden shadow in many of my friends, family and public figures.
And here are few:
Those in the health, or yoga industry, teaching people wellness or balance, are often unbalanced and on the verge of burnout. (see this video - click here as an example)
Those who place a lot of importance on truth and authenticity, often carry the shadow of unrecognised inauthenticity and lying.
Religious and spiritual figures (the most widely spoken of) often carry sexual perversions.
Those who are ‘healers’ are often suffering the most.
Public figures and celebrities who attain/need attention and recognition struggle the most to become vulnerable.
Tantric or sexual masters struggle the most to accept lasting love into their life.
Those who are trying to please others in life, or be seen as ‘good people’, can often be the most resentful.
It seems almost a global phenomenon, that many teachers who claim to be experts at one thing or another, are really projecting their core shadows onto the world. Or projecting the key aspect which they need to heal. This is not a bad thing, but its anecdote or medicine (for them) is the precise thing they are teaching. And what a gift that is. For once they discover this, their teaching becomes that much more powerful and authentic. They truly become the expert they sought to be, and they simple are just themselves. Their message is deep, felt and will shared widely.
This lesson I believe is vital. If we spend just 5 minutes, reflecting what our projections are, and asking our loved ones what they believe our shadows are (because we don’t see our own), we can address them with less pain than I had to go through.
But don’t take my advice :), this has only recently been discovered by myself, and still needs to sink deeply.